Daniel made his way to the unincorporated community of 72 people in Michigan, and with a small amount of money he was able to buy himself a position of power.
“I was looking for a town willing to make me mayor,”
Daniel told HuffPost. “They’ll do it in Hell for $100, so I caught a redeye to Michigan and got sworn in.”
His first act was to start banning straight people from the community.
“My ban is a copy-and-paste of Trump’s Muslim ban, but with heterosexuals instead,” Daniel said. He just wanted to keep all those radical heteros out of his new town.
But Daniel is a fair man. He had no problem with heterosexuals already in the town remaining; they had to pay $84,000 (which they could reclaim following a year of abstinence from straight sex). Reparative therapy was suggested to help find your gay side.
He was quickly impeached.
“That’s actually not a problem,” he explained. “Everyone who becomes mayor there gets impeached. Most of the people who visit are same-sex couples who want to be married in Hell.”