October 27, 2011 | Other News

Get your freak on for Halloween

There's less than a week until Halloween, when horny devils head out into the night hoping to scare up a few tricks or treats.

Sadly, some of you haven't gotten into the spirit yet. Work is busy. Bills need to be paid. You have the sniffles. Or maybe you think Halloween is just for kids.

But come on! This is the only time of year you get to dress up, live out any fantasy, and share a wicked scare or two without getting into too much trouble. 

So with this in mind we've rounded up some fun frights - from books to movies to porn - with a decidedly gay twist. Perhaps this will inspire the uninspired ...

Costume idea: Jack-o(ff)-lantern.

Books:

Queer horror has been around for some time. You can go back as far as 1872 to find horror themes mixing sweetly with homosexuality. Sheridan le Fanu wrote the lesbian vampire novella Carmilla that year, with the title character pursuing a young woman.

Of course, most of these older works won't offer much for the gay man. If gays are hinted at, they are usually portrayed as the big baddie, or they repent, or they die (or, more often than not, all three). Even in the pulp novels, which became popular around World War II and saw gay themes more openly explored, gay men were most often portrayed as victims of their own lust. Three on a Broomstick by Don Holliday is an early example of this.

However, finding quality gay horror novels today isn't that difficult, and the choices range from the campy to the dead serious. Some of the best reviewed works include: John Peyton Cooke's Out For Blood, about a man dying of cancer who gets a chance to become a vampire, but with a much greater cost than he expected; Anne Rivers Siddon's The House Next Door, in which a home twists people's best qualities into something nasty; and Jay B. Laws' Steam, about an evil presence haunting, and hunting, the streets of San Francisco.

Costume idea: Darth Vader's gay cousin, Garth.

Movies:

Not much of a reader? Well, you can always rent a scary flick.

Cracked.com recently named the top 5 most "Unintentionally Gay Horror Movies." The list includes The Lost Boys, The Covenant, The Forsaken and Jeepers Creepers II. Number one on the list: A Nightmare on Elm Street II: Freddy's Revenge, where an abusive gym teacher is dragged into a shower, stripped naked and whipped.

Perhaps you'd prefer something more intentionally gay. You can check out October Moon, directed by Jason Paul Collum. It explores a deadly gay love triangle in the vein of Fatal Attraction. Or there's Hellbent, by Paul Etheredge, about gay men being stalked by a masked killer during a Halloween parade in West Hollywood, California. 

Expect lots of bad acting, but the trade-off is sexy actors in their underwear.

Costume idea: sausage in a meat-lovers pizza.

Porn:

It's a full moon on Friday the Fuckteenth!

Someone is about to get staked in Twinklight.

Need something hardcore? Porn producers love a good parody and horror is a great genre to poke a little fun at. There is Halloweiner: Friday the Fuckteenth, Twink Blood, Queer of the Damned and Bonesaw.

Believe it or not, sometimes the parody is actually better than the original. Take Twinklight, for example. Brooding vampires are annoying. Brooding vampires with boners, and the desperate need to fuck, are fun! And there's no bad acting from Kristen Stewart to sit through. The sequel, Twinklight: Vampires Diary, is due out this week.

A zombie twink.

But if you want something a little less tongue in cheek, you need to check out the work of reluctant pornographer Bruce LaBruce. Not afraid to push the envelope, he decided to mix zombies and porn.

First he created Otto; Or Up With Dead People, which follows a young zombie named Otto as he creates a home in an abandoned amusement park in Berlin. A chance encounter with some filmmakers leads to a role in a zombie porn. They'll cast anyone these days!

L.A. Zombie Hardcore

Upping the sex and horror factor, LaBruce created LA Zombie, starring Francois Sagat. A lone creature emerges from the depths of the Pacific Ocean, able to reanimate the dead through depraved acts of man-sex. This movie was actually shown at various gay and lesbian film festivals, but was deemed so offensive by some governments it was actually banned. In Australia, one man had his house searched because he planned to show the film during an underground film festival.

Costume idea: paint your cock like a pumpkin! (Martha Stewart would approve!)

Toys:

If you don't have any luck getting anally stabbed by your favorite monster on Halloween night, Fleshjack has you covered. This year the company released a new series of fiendish fuck toys for all you monster cock lovers (emphasis on monster!).

From Frankenstein to Dracula, you will find a dildo to match your dark fantasies. There's even a two headed alien cock for that late night probing.

See, Halloween really is for adults. Throw off your inhibitions. Put on a sexy costume. And send us a pic of your pumpkin-painted prick!

Happy Homo Halloween!