April 2, 2009 | Sex Life

Sex Toys 101

If you are new to playing with sex toys, either alone or with your partner -- or if you aren't sure if you've been taking care of them correctly -- you may want to read on. Sex toys are an amazing way to spice up your sex life, but they can do more harm than good if not used correctly.

First rule: Inspect before you use! When you buy a new toy and finally get it out of its people-proof plastic wrapper, take a few minutes to look it over. Check for rough seams, which can cut into delicate membranes. If made from glass (like a dildo or butt plug) look for cracking; the last thing you want is a trip to the doctor to explain why you have a glass 'paperweight' stuck up your bum.

Don't share! Sex toys should never be shared ... unless you cover it up with a condom. This will help keep any  infections from passing between partners. Sadly our asses, as lovely as they are, are also breeding grounds for bacteria; you want to avoid sharing these things with your partner. If you play with men and women, this is especially important as vagina's are very susceptible to bacterial infections. Never, ever go from bum to vajayjay without cleaning the toy first!  Grab a condom, use it, replace condom, use it on someone else. Easy!

More than just a spring cleaning! Sex shouldn't be a chore, but you do need to keep your toys as clean as possible. And this means wiping off lube, bacteria and other things more than twice a year! For metal and glass toys, hot water and soap is a good bet as these items are non-porous; just clean and then air dry. Yes, you can even place these items on the top level of your dishwasher ... but do you really want to clean your butt plug with your dinner plates? [more]

Toys with battery packs must be handled more carefully as you do not want to wet the electrical component (and risk ruining it). Just be careful to avoid this area while cleaning.

Silicone products can also be boiled for a couple minutes, and may reassure some people that their dildo is truly clean.

Rubber and latex toys are a little bit of a problem as they are made from porous materials, meaning they actually absorb things into themselves. Again warm water is good, and you can even use an anti-bacterial hand soap. However, you must be careful to remove all traces of the soap as it can lead to irritation, and can actually cause the latex to break down. Condoms will actually make using these toys stress free.

Make sure your toys are completely dry before tucking them away; mold can form on some toys and lead to serious issues in your nether regions.

Of course, packaging should include care suggestions for each item. As much as it pains you to do so, read the instructions!

Find body friendly toys! Not all toys are created equal, of course. And not every toy is right for every person.

First, make sure you understand your body and what allergies you have. You need to find toys that will not cause a reaction to (or in) your body, so hypo-allergenic toys (made of glass or metal) are certainly an attractive option.

However, glass and metal come with their own body-affecting issues. These items are inflexible and if used incorrectly they can cause internal damage. Playing too roughly with a glass butt plug, for example, can tear tissue.  Ouchy! As well, find a toy with a slight curve so that it can actually reach in and hit your p-spot (prostate). This fits your ass better and you'll enjoy the experience more (and not be hurting yourself).

And finally: don't be embarrassed! When you shop for your toys ask the sales people questions. Feel how things vibrate. Ask about cleaning. Tell your partner if something is too big, or too small, for you.

Fun times!